Chemsex weekly email check-ins
How to check in with me weekly by email
Respond to following questions (copy & paste these questions & your responses into an email to me.)
1 Did you achieve your goals re chems use in the last 7 days?
2. How did you experience & manage your cravings in the last 7 days? What worked, what didn’t?
3. Do you plan to use chems in the coming seven days?
- If Yes; what boundaries are in place? (Eg how long your session will last, what you will do, what you won’t, etc.) (see harm reduction info)
- If No; How confident are you to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not confident; 10= very confident)
- If No; How important to you is it to accomplish this goal (scale 1= not important; 10= very important)
4. What is it keeping you motivated to accomplish this goal?
5. What are the most vulnerable moments/times in the coming 7 days? When should you be expecting the strongest cravings? What could go ‘wrong’ with your plan?
- After work Fridays
- Weekday mornings
- Sat late afternoon (no plans)
- Bed time weekdays, can’t sleep
- Travelling home after work
- Sat night, alone
- Sat night
- dinner/drinks with friends
- Sunday mornings, breakfast time
- Sunday mid morning, no plans
- Sunday afternoon, bored
- Sunday late afternoon, after a busy day
- Late night Sat, can’t sleep
6. What are your triggers? What sets off cravings for you? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)
- When I’m alone
- After drinking alone
- When out drinking with friends
- After clubbing
- When playing online/on Apps – no specific plans
- When returning to London from a trip
- After a fight with a friend/family member/partner
- When I feel lonely & miss intimacy
- When I feel bored
- When I feel stressed and anxious
- When I feel horny
- When I feel depressed
- When I feel angry at myself, someone else, or at life.
- When I get unexpected correspondence/an invitation to party
- Returning home alone after a night out
- Returning home to partner after a night out
- After an unsatisfactory sex encounter
- After being rejected online
- Whenever I feel like celebrating
- Whenever I feel I deserve a reward for “being good”
7. What can you do differently next time you feel a craving or trigger? (Tick all that apply; or see video suggestions)
- Leave the room/place I’m in
- Call a friend/supportive person
- Clean the house/do gardening
- Write a letter/journal note to yourself
- Record a video message to yourself on your phone, to remind yourself of consequences
- Go to gym/do exercise
- Cook a favourite meal
- Practice meditation/mindfulness
- Watch a favourite (distracting) film or box-set
- Have a (distracting) activity ready for just these moments; make a list of these
- Get offline/close the App/
- Take a deep breath; smile.
- Turn off any pornography
- Masturbate (quickly) Then occupy yourself off line
- Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings
- Take a shower
- Tell someone how I’m feeling
- Change the mood/music/lighting/temperature
- Go to the local shop. Buy chocolate. Ask shopkeeper how his day was
- Put favourite music in your ears. Go for a walk
- Be with people who care/value you
- Take a deep breath: smile. Continue breathing. Take in your surroundings
- Call a friend/supportive person
- Create a list of things you want to do this week
- Think about what you’ll be doing two days from now – if you use, if you don’t.
- Watch a YouTube playlist that helps you deal with cravings
- Change your emotional state somehow. Be creative.
Copy & paste these questions and your responses into an email to me)